All relationships ebb and flow and go through changes, so it can be difficult for some to know when the marriage is over. You might consider your marriage a commitment and a forever bond. Most people make numerous attempts to make things right before they begin to lose hope of saving their marriage. If you have tried marriage counseling and are wondering what to do next, read on for some questions to ask yourself.
Is There Repeated Infidelity?
Cheating does not necessarily signal the end of a marriage; however, it does signal that there is a problem with either you or your spouse and your relationship. Continued infidelity is no way to repair a relationship and can lead to even more problems. Serial cheaters may not be able to stop without counseling, but more than two or more instances of infidelity by either of you might mean an end to the relationship.
Are You Suffering Emotionally and Physically?
Couples that are unable to treat each other with respect can signal big problems. No spouse should allow themselves to be bullied, manipulated, emotionally or physically abused, etc. Some spouses won't stop until you take action. Be sure to speak to a divorce attorney and law enforcement about ways to protect you and your children from an abuser.
What are the Worst Things That Could Happen?
Fear of not knowing what might happen keeps many people unhappily wed. To help you deal with things in a more logical fashion, make a list of your fears and concerns about divorce. Once you see these distressing issues on paper, you can come up with some solutions to address them. For example, loneliness is a common fear of those who've been part of a couple for some time. To stay busy, active, and social you could try focusing on exploring new hobbies, learning a new skill, joining a club, participating more in church activities, and more. Other common fears are losing custody of a child, being destitute, losing the family home, etc. Some of these fears can be allayed by speaking with your divorce attorney about them. You might find that some of your fears connected to a divorce are baseless.
No one can tell you when it's time to throw in the towel with your marriage, but answers to the above questions can be a starting point for thought. Speak to your divorce attorney and find out what to expect if you decide to file for divorce. You can also contact law firms like the Law Office of Faye Riva Cohen, P.C. for more information.